Solo Dining in India: Why ‘Table for One’ is Still a Spectacle for Women

A solo woman hunched over her plate - neither guarded by a man nor giggling with girlfriends - seems to elicit more reactions than the food itself

There’s nothing quite like biting into a hot, crispy aloo tikki at a bustling street corner—the spice hits, the chutney sings, and for a moment, all is right with the world. Unless, of course, you’re a woman doing it alone.

Somewhere between the sizzle of the tava and the chime of steel plates, Indian women eating alone in public morph into something of a spectacle. A solo woman hunched over her plate—neither guarded by a man nor giggling with girlfriends—seems to elicit more reactions than the food itself. People stare as if the tikki is just a decoy, and the real item on the table is a question: “Why is she alone?”

In urban India, this performance is subtle but unmistakable. In semi-urban settings, it’s almost theatrical. Waiters pause, families whisper, auto-walas smirk. Dining solo, for a man, signals independence. For a woman, it often reads as deviance. In a society where public behavior is tightly gendered, a woman alone is rarely just eating—she’s assumed to be waiting, mourning, rebelling, or worse, available.

The judgment comes dressed in many forms—sometimes it’s a concerned uncle offering unsolicited company. Sometimes it’s the awkward shuffle of two teenage boys who’ve never seen a woman sip chai in silence without being on her phone. And sometimes, it’s the slow realization that no one’s even offering her a second tissue because, well, the assumption is: she shouldn’t be there in the first place.

But this isn’t just about gender—it’s also about class-coded behavior. A man in formal clothes at a café typing away is seen as a “professional.” A woman doing the same is either a freelancer or, suspiciously, “too modern.” A middle-class woman having a meal at a roadside stall is “bold,” but a working-class woman doing the same is “loose.” Class filters the gaze through a different lens, layering judgment with socio-economic undertones.

So what’s the big deal about a woman eating alone? Everything—and nothing. Because under that aloo tikki lies the slow-cooked truth of Indian society: that women’s presence in public spaces is always being measured, explained, and evaluated. She must justify being there, not just with her appetite, but with her intentions.

But here’s the punchline: women are doing it anyway. From metro platforms to dhaba benches, across malls and mess canteens, the solo female diner is rising—hungry, unapologetic, and increasingly unbothered by the garnish of judgment.

Pass the chutney, we’re just getting started

It’s raining outside. You just made yourself a heartwarming bowl of your comfort food. You find yourself snuggled into your couch as you pull over a blanket and put on your favorite show, as you devour your food. This scenario is not uncommon; it’s very often the way people find themselves unwinding after a hectic day of work. Eating by yourself within the confines and four walls of your own home rarely frightens or discomforts you. But a small change in setting, from the personal comfort of your home to the public space of a restaurant, can quickly lead to doubts about dining alone.

Glances, stares, whispers, and snickers often follow when someone dines alone. But not everyone is subjected to this sort of treatment; it is often reserved for women. A man stepping out for a meal by himself earns the badge of being a stag and a bachelor. It’s a choice not out of the seemingly ordinary. It makes sense. Yet, if a woman is found by herself for a meal, it is a pitied choice, one that is made out of situational compulsion against the societal norm. She does not earn any badges; instead, all she gets is unwanted attention in the guise of stares and pointed fingers behind hushed tones of gossip.

All such socio-contextual incidental markers get even more complicated when Gen Z enters the chat. A generation that consists of individuals born in the late 1990s and up to the early 2010s, they are considered to be the first digitally driven generation. They have woven the internet into various aspects of their life. They are the ones who shaped social media into the socio-cultural and socio-economic phenomenon it is today, and in turn are widely influenced by it (McKinsey & Company, 2024). Through social media, they often create or indulge in trends that are part of a spectrum ranging from morally questionable and distasteful to socially conscious and encouraging. Irrespective of where the trend finds itself on the spectrum, it will definitely lead to chatter and clout.

The urban female Gen Z has attempted to embrace the idea of solitude through various trends and their micro variants. The concept of ‘me-time’ may not have emerged from this generation, but it has close ties with their subculture of self-care. Solo dining is often labelled as solo dates by them, which is an attempt at embracing solitude and is considered a beneficial practice for their mental health. Solitude helps calm down strong negative emotions and can act as a grounding technique. Historically, such a state of being has been perceived as a punishment, which may be the reason why being by yourself in a social setting of a restaurant can be seen as a pitiful act. And practices of solitude have been normalised for men to a relatively larger extent than for women, wherein ideas of bachelor pads and man caves are popularized (T. Nguyen & N. Weinstein, personal communication, June 2024). However, the same is seen for women as a harmful threat to her dignity and status in society. This is where the self-care and ‘me-time’ trends of Gen Z step in for women. Social media trends move to normalise women spending time by themselves and not relying on external companies.

Within the larger bracket of a subculture known as ‘girlhood,’ various sub-trends emerged as a form of empowerment and self-care for the female urban Gen Z strata. One such trend has been the advent of ‘girl dinner’ in the summer of 2023. It revolved around women sharing their homemade meals online, consisting of a bunch of mismatched food items that were made with minimal effort and based on the availability of items at home.

But even with these social media trends, there are various societal and structural obstacles that hinder the attempt at normalisation. This gender societal divide becomes even more amplified when the trend of ‘boy dinner’ comes as a response to ‘girl dinner.’ A trend once again revolving around meals, but this time, by and for men. So instead of minimal effort meals prepared by them, they involve a certain sense of laziness and unhygienic practices, such as eating from dirty dishes or leftover pizza lying under a blanket. The contrast between the two reflects the divide, as while the ‘girl dinner’ is supportive of minimal effort meals that cover the basic needs of the individual and is considered to be a form of self-care, ‘boy dinner’ may do the opposite. It allows men not to be accountable for their own health and hygiene. ‘Boy dinner’ commends men for embracing the lowest standards of hygiene, with the widely acknowledged sexist slogan ‘boys will be boys.’ Women mostly resort to ‘girl dinner’ to take a break from their regular manner of meals of a holistic, healthy diet. However, for men, ‘boy dinner’ is the norm, not the exception. The contrast of these two trends lends an understanding of the gendered double standards held for self-care and household chores (Blogier, 2023).

While compared to the ‘boy dinner’ trend, ‘girl dinner’ may hold a more morally grounded standing, it still falls short within the real-world context. It normalises minimal-effort meals prepared easily at home for oneself, but it poses other risks at the same time. It subconsciously builds on the conceptual understanding that a woman must know how to cook, feed, and nurture. Even if she is doing it for herself, she must use the material available and accessible to her to make do and nurture herself. Moreover, the ‘girl dinner’ trend, once again, is limited to empowering women to experience solitude within their private space. It would be considered a major leap for the same woman who posts a ‘girl dinner’ reel to go to a restaurant and ask for a table for one. Independence in one’s personal space is often free of public judgment.

Solo-dining is not a new trend or phenomenon; it is one that has been around for a long time. Its popularity has reached the management teams of restaurants, wherein many now design menus catered to serve a meal for one. However, all of this comes through a gendered understanding of solo-dining (Pancholi, 2024).

Social media trends are constantly evolving, and while the two ‘dinner’ trends saw their rise and fall in 2023 itself, there has been little to no chatter of new self-care trends that prioritize solitude for women even in public spaces. Gen Z women may have explored and experienced the act of eating alone at home or in a personal space; they have yet to reach the public domain in search of solitude. These social media trends may have normalised the notion of women being alone in public spaces, but there is still a gap in the same coming into practice.

Author: Meher Malhotra, Undergraduate Student; Anshika Arora, Assistant  General Manager, Department of Higher Education Counseling (HEC), FLAME University; and Prof. Moitrayee Das, Faculty of Psychology, FLAME University.